For as long as I can remember, I have always felt a connection to the queer community and empathy for their struggles. I have always shown my support and allyship whenever possible, whether it is in the workplace, with family and friends, or in my online presence. I never thought much about the impact my voice made until I was approached by a family member about it.
I did not have much of a relationship with this family member at the time, as they were very quiet at family events and were usually more interested in spending time with my dog than me. When this family member came out to me, I was more surprised that this person chose me to come out to than I was about their identity. However, he clarified that he had seen my social media posts and heard me speak in defense of the LGBTQIA+ community at family events and knew I was a “safe person”.
This was a turning point for me. At the time, I worried I was too vocal about my beliefs and might inadvertently alienate others. However, this event made me realize that, as an ally, being quiet and polite is not an option. We need to stand up not only for our openly queer friends and family, but for those who might not be ready to identify and are quietly searching for a safe place to talk or ask questions.
Now that this family member is living his truth, I am happy to report that he is much more present at family events, and we have all loved seeing his personality shine through now that he feels safe to do so. I have built a great relationship with him and his partner over the years, and have loved watching him blossom into the person he’s meant to be.
I urge all my fellow allies to be loud and proud about being a safe space for your friends, family, and coworkers. You never know who might be watching and might need you.
If you are struggling, please reach out to a safe person or a support organization in your area.
